For years, friends whom I would speak with every day would just happen not to call on Father’s day. At first, I couldn’t understand why my buddies who had been so worried about their dates on Saturday didn’t call on Sunday to tell me how the big nights went. My other friends who use Sundays as excuses to have boozy brunches and catch-up dates on the phone also never reached out. At first, I assumed that they were just busy with their own dads on Father’s Day. It wasn’t until a few years of this silent treatment on the third Sunday in June that I realized that I, like the smelly kid in school, was being avoided!
As I became more comfortable celebrating Father’s Day without my dad, I also became open to discussing Father’s Day with my friends. It was then that I learned that for years many of them had been too nervous to ring me on that Sunday. They apologized for letting me mourn alone. Many admitted that the reason they didn’t reach out to me was because they just didn’t know what to say. Some didn’t want to discuss their dates from the night before, fearing those conversations were trivial in comparison to what I was going through. Others said that they didn’t want to call because they didn’t want to upset me. My friends are all brilliant, open, and loving people. But, strangely, this was a topic that they just could not figure out how to discuss.
Inspired by my friends’ confusion, I’ve created this video to share my top five tips for how to best support a friend who is fatherless on Father’s Day. I hope these suggestions help you to be there for someone who probably needs some extra support this Sunday. Happy Father’s Day to all of you!